In this day and age personal growth is very important as the world and technology is constantly changing and you can never know everything about everything.
I used to be in a very dark place in my 20’s due to circumstances beyond my control I was depressed angry and withdrawn from the world. For me this was the worst possible place to be as I felt lost, alone and without direction. I struggled with being in this situation as I was a deep thinker and couldn’t recognize that there were other options and possibilities out there for me which kept me at a standstill in my life and constantly repeating the same choices which lead to the same patterns in my life happening over and over again.
I was like this because of my childhood and having been raped by a stranger at the age of 22 in Queensland. At this point in time, I did not know what personal development was about or even that it existed. I was born into a strictly religious family of which I was an outcast and at school and at religious youth group functions I was bullied and treated as though there was something wrong with me. The religion and school always taught that to be successful in life you had to be married with children and possibly have a job by the age of 25.
After my 10-year de-facto relationship split up I moved in to a place on my own and that was very scary for me having been through what I had already been through in my life, having sent a monster to prison for what he did to me as well as the fact I needed to reinvent myself as the old me was not working anymore as I had to leave my partner and my best friend behind me and start a new life. I was very closed off from the world around me and I had an invisible sign on my head saying don’t come near me. I was angry and bitter.
So, I embarked on an adventure of trying to fix my life and myself up when I stumbled on the personal development and self-help industry where I proceeded to work on myself personally and professionally. Before I stumbled on the personal development industry, I hated reading as I was led to believe as a child that I was a slow reader and so for may years I believed it. I met my neighbor once when I first moved into the place I had moved in to after my 10-year relationship had ended and did not speak to her till 5 years later. She said she had seen me around the place many times but she could tell I was in a dark place and so she avoided me. Until 5 years later when she sensed that I had changed and then we became the best of friends. In one of our conversations, she told me how much she thought I had grown and change and was more open to people and things and was no longer in that dark place.
It was a very long and hard journey getting myself out of depression and off medication to love what some would say is a normal life. But to get to that point I had to completely change my lifestyle and develop my holistic system that supports me and moves me forward in my life when things go bad. My system took several years, and many bad things had happened to me along the way before I perfected the system. They system got me out of depression which I had been in and out of for many years and helped me manage the severe anxiety I had. I have now been out of depression for and managing my anxiety extremely well for over 14 years and have never slipped back into depression. My system also helps me face many of my fears head on and replace many of my limiting beliefs that I had from childhood.
Reflecting back now, I have come an awful long way in my life as I now handle things much differently to what I did many years ago when I was in that very dark place full of depression, anxiety and fear. I am now able to reframe my thoughts and emotions, sit with them and work through them if need be and face my fears head on which moves me forward from things very quickly. I am also now able to see that there are many option/possibilities for me out there and not just one which has given me hope and belief that things can and do change for the better. People now call me resilient and my closest friends have told me at times that they hardly recognize me now as the way I was and who I was back when they first met me are completely different and they like the new me.
If there is something you don’t like about yourself or your life you can change it, but you have to be willing to put in the hard work to change it for yourself as it is your life, and you need to take responsibility for it. ©
Copyright © 2022 Lynette Diehm.
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